Can a Non Family Member Get Custody of a Child?

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Child custody is ane of the about heavily contested decisions in divorce proceedings. There are two types of child custody: physical custody entitles a parent to have their child live with him or her, and legal custody refers to the right and duty to determine aspects of your child'southward upbringing (e.1000., education, medical care, etc.). At that place is likewise a difference betwixt sole and joint or shared custody. In many cases, parents are awarded articulation legal custody fifty-fifty in situations where merely one parent is awarded sole physical custody.^[1] In situations where one parent has sole concrete custody of a child, the court may award visitation rights to the other parent. Visitation allows the parent without concrete custody to spend time with their kid.^[ii] When awarding custody, the court considers many factors, such as the age and emotional state of the child, as well as the income, employment condition and living situation of each parent. Start the process by finding an attorney to help you file for custody.

1. ane

   Consider mediation. Courts may lodge mediation once custody proceedings accept begun, merely y'all can also utilize a mediation service to settle your custody arrangements out of court. Mediations are conducted by trained professionals who tin can help you and the other parent come to an agreement regarding your kid's custody.^[3]

   • Mediation is a neutral process. The mediator will assistance you and the other parent come up to a conclusion that is in the kid'southward best involvement.
   • Even if y'all are unable to come to an agreement in this process, arbitration can help you come to an understanding of the main issues in the custody dispute. It tin can also help you set up a plan for how to proceed in courtroom, if necessary.
   • Many courts offer arbitration counseling or referrals to trained mediators.^[4]

2. 2

   Brainstorm looking for an attorney. Filing for custody is not something y'all desire to try to handle by yourself. Yous'll want to hire someone familiar with your state's custody laws to help you file the right paperwork and include information that will assistance y'all go sole custody. If yous fill out the forms incorrectly or leave out important data, you might not finish up with a custody agreement that meets your and your kid's needs.

   • Ask your friends, family and colleagues for a recommendation. It is especially helpful if these people have been in a similar state of affairs. These referrals are often useful because you lot tin can have some idea of what to expect from the attorney before you meet with him/her.
   • Look for a reputable lawyer with several years of feel in family unit law, particularly those who accept helped parents work out custody agreements.
   • To find an attorney in your land, phone call your land bar clan and enquire for a referral, or wait online at the state bar website under the "referral" section.
   • Earlier scheduling a consultation, check with your state bar association to confirm that the attorney you're considering is eligible to do in your land. You will also be able to see whether the attorney has a disciplinary record.^[five]

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3. 3

   Schedule a consultation and ask questions before you hire the attorney. Although many lawyers charge a pocket-sized fee for a consultation, information technology is worth it to find the right attorney who will best handle your custody case. Consider these questions you might inquire a potential chaser to determine whether he or she is right for y'all:^[6]

   • "How long accept y'all proficient domestic relations and custody law?" Y'all should be looking for 3 to five years of feel.
   • "Accept you always handled matters like mine before?" Here, you want the attorney's answer to be yes; that he or she has handled at least 50 custody matters; and has handled custody matters in the past year.
   • "What are the possible outcomes?" The lawyer should have no trouble explaining the possible outcomes of your instance to yous in an easily understandable way.
   • "Do you lot know the local domestic relations/family court judges?" Yous should hire a lawyer who knows the local judge(s) who will exist handling your custody instance.
   • "How will you keep me informed of the progress my case is making?" Hither, you want to brand sure the attorney will communicate with you regularly over email, by phone or in person.
   • "How much will you charge? And what will the fee comprehend?" Y'all should discuss the chaser's fee before you hire the lawyer. Make sure that the fee includes expenses and court costs (such as filing fees), and make certain the attorney is upfront and articulate nigh what services they are charging you lot for.
   • "Can I take the names and contact information from prior clients to hear well-nigh their experience?" The attorney should accept no problem giving you the names of past clients to talk to.

4. iv

   Select an attorney that you lot feel comfy working with. Do not choose someone that makes y'all feel uncomfortable in any way, regardless of the person's experience or ratings.

   • If you are unable to beget an attorney, consider finding a local legal help program that can find a low-cost chaser to have your case or give you lot communication. For instance, in Alabama, the Alabama Volunteer Lawyers Association often takes domestic relations cases on a pro bono ground. It besides runs a weekly dispensary at the state's domestic relations courthouses.^[vii]
   • A number of law schools operate "legal clinics" that offer low-toll legal services to the community. These clinics are unremarkably run by constabulary faculty and attorneys who are training law students. The type of services offered past these clinics varies. If y'all have a police force schoolhouse in your area, contact the school to see if information technology runs a legal dispensary and/or offers family unit justice services. For example, the Law School at Northwestern operates a Children and Family unit Justice Center as part of its Bluhm Legal Dispensary.^[8]

5. 5

   Visit your local courtroom clerk. Each state handles child custody arrangement cases differently, but each requires that yous file the appropriate petition. The type of petition y'all file is determined by your specific circumstances. Visit or call the courtroom clerk to get the information you demand regarding the appropriate petition. Tell the clerk that y'all want to schedule a child custody hearing and enquire how to file a petition to start the procedure. These petitions might apply to your case:^[ix]

   • Petition to revise or update a petition that is already in identify. If a court-ordered child custody understanding already exists, y'all will need to file a move to alter that agreement.
   • Petition to institute custody. If there has never been a courtroom proceeding to honour custody to either parent, you will need to file this blazon of petition.
   • Petition to found paternity and install custody. If you are a father whose paternity is in doubtfulness, you lot must file a petition with the courts to mandate a paternity test earlier your custody requests will exist considered.

6. half-dozen

   Fill out the paperwork and file your proposal for total custody (if applicative). In about cases, your attorney should aid y'all make full out and file the paperwork for you lot. Just in case the attorney doesn't, continue these factors in mind:

   • Many courts provide a template for y'all to utilise to outline exactly how y'all want the legal and physical custody to be delegated. To notice out whether your state provides a template, ask the court clerk or check on the local court's website.
   • If custodial rights were already settled, you'll demand to explain why you want to make a change.
   • The court will ask for specifics about every aspect of your child'southward intendance. Y'all must reply in appropriate particular. This will explain the extent to which yous held the responsibilities of caregiver.
   • Y'all should brand two copies of the forms; one set for your records and the other set for the other parent involved. The courtroom will keep the original.
   • In most cases, you volition need to pay a fee when filing papers with a court. If you cannot afford to pay the court filing fees, contact the courtroom to come across if yous are eligible for a fee waiver. Many states volition provide waivers to low-income households. For example, in California, you are eligible for a fee waiver if:
     • Y'all receive public benefits (eastward.one thousand., SNAP, Medicaid); OR
     • Your household income falls beneath a minimum threshold (e.thousand., $2,092.71 per calendar month for a family of three);^[10] OR
     • The courtroom rules that y'all are eligible for a waiver due to your income.

7. 7

   Serve the other party with a notice of your petition for a kid custody arrangement. For the case to keep, you need to brand the other parent aware that you lot are requesting a change in custody. The procedure for serving someone varies from land to land, but you will not be able to serve the papers yourself. You may either make a request for service through the courthouse or hire a service company to do the job.^[11]

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1. 1

   Prepare to demonstrate that you lot have the necessary characteristics and financial stability required to raise the child. Yous must collect testify that you tin be a suitable parent to the child. When evaluating a parent's worthiness, a judge volition consider such factors as:^[12]

   • Employment history. A parent should be able to show competence in holding a job and existence fiscally fit to provide a child'south cloth needs. However, even if the parent doesn't have adequate employment, most judges won't run into that equally a reason to deny him/her custody or at to the lowest degree visitation rights.
   • Housing. A fit parent is one that tin can provide a safe environs for the child to alive in. You should plan to provide testify that the other parent does not take a stable living state of affairs.
   • Corruption. Any history of emotional, sexual, physical or drug corruption is taken into consideration by family unit courts. Information technology is 1 of the biggest contributors to decisions awarding full custody to one parent. Collect police records and other evidence of abuse. If you are a domestic violence survivor, y'all can file for a temporary emergency custody of your child to found legal protections for you and the child.^[13]
   • Wellness. Parents must show that they are both physically and emotionally capable of caring for a kid.

2. 2

   Understand other factors that the courtroom may consider. State law determines what factors a courtroom is to consider when making a custody decision. Nonetheless, courts are obligated to act in the kid's best interests. In add-on to the characteristics of the parents as mentioned in the previous stride, courts often consider the needs and wishes of the kid when making custody decisions.^{[14] [15]}

   • The child's age. Nursing infants are very likely to stay with their mothers. Children above the age of 12 are probable to take more of a say in which parent is awarded custody.^[16]
   • The kid's health. If a child has particular medical or mental health needs, the court may decide which parent is virtually able to provide for those needs.^[17]
   • The child's human relationship with each parent. If the child has a preference for which parent they would like to live with, a judge may (simply is not legally required to) consider this preference.^[18]
   • The child'due south ties to her/his schoolhouse, home and community, and whether these ties would exist disrupted by a custody determination. For example, if a kid is enrolled in school, the parent who has remained in the family home in that school commune may be awarded custody to keep things stable for the child. However, the court may also make the conclusion to award the parent with custody the right to live in the family home to preserve stability.^{[19] [20]}
   • Sexual orientation or gender identity. Some states practise not allow courts to consider sexual orientation or gender identity in custody disputes. Yet, some states either permit or do non prohibit courts from using these factors in a custody decision.^[21] In custody decisions involving same-sex parents, some judges may base of operations their decisions on personal and social biases. Unfortunately, it is extremely hard to opposite a guess's custody decision even if it based on personal or social bias.^{[22] [23] [24]}
   • Contrary to pop belief, a courtroom volition non "automatically" assign custody to the female parent or father.^[25]
   • DivorceNet maintains a database of what factors each country considers in child custody cases.^[26]

3. iii

   Offer bear witness of abuse or danger. This is very unlikely to apply to most custody decisions. However, if you lot believe that the other parent is a serious danger to you and/or your child, you should collect and provide evidence that will support your argument, including:^[27]

   • Law reports that indicate violent or aggressive behavior on the office of the other parent. If police force reports are not bachelor, you should practice your best to document on your own the date, time, place and details of whatsoever abusive behavior.
   • Medical bills or records that are suggestive of corruption or neglect.
   • Photos that document incidents or injuries.
   • Statements from witnesses that describe a dangerous pattern of beliefs by the other parent.
   • Psychiatric evaluations of the child.^[28]

4. 4

   Attend arbitration. Once custody proceedings start, a approximate will likely order mediation. Arbitration is run past professional person mediators whose job is to help parents collaborate on a programme to conform custody. Many states offer mediation services that are operated in conjunction with the courts.^[29]

   • Mediation may work faster than a court proceeding. Many judges consider it to be less stressful for the child.^[30]
   • In some cases, arbitration tin be done with each parent separately.
   • Your willingness to cooperate with the other parent is likely to be considered by the judge when making the last custody decision.^[31]

5. 5

   Understand that a estimate may lodge a custody evaluation. If you and the other parent can't come to an agreement, the courtroom may order a custody evaluation. This evaluation is usually washed by a mental health professional or social worker with special grooming in family issues.^[32]

   • During the evaluation, the evaluator volition interview the child, the parents and other relevant persons (teachers, doctors, etc.). The evaluator may observe the interactions between parent and child in a home setting.
   • In some cases, the court will appoint a Guardian advertizement Litem rather than a custody investigator. The Guardian ad Litem is, essentially, an attorney appointed to consider the kid's best involvement in the custody decision.^[33]
   • If the courtroom orders a custody evaluation, the judge may assign an evaluator or provide you with several options. You may likewise exist able to hire a private evaluator, simply go along in mind that this will be significantly more expensive.^[34]

6. six

   Get to the courtroom hearing. You should have an attorney present for every step of this process. If you accept not been able to come to a custody agreement through mediation, you'll demand to go to your court hearing and brand your instance there.

   • Keep your absurd during the process. Y'all are trying to demonstrate that yous are a rational, supportive individual who tin provide a stable home for a kid. Courtroom outbursts will be held confronting you lot.

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1. 1

   Understand when it is appropriate to seek custody. You might seek custody of a child who is non your biological child for several reasons. Yous should exist aware that it volition be very difficult to go custody of a child if the biological parents do non wish to surrender their rights to custody.

   • Adoption. Gaining legal custody of a child is not the same equally adopting a kid. Custody will end one time the kid reaches machismo. Adoption is a permanent legal relationship that makes a child part of your family unit, regardless of historic period. Obtaining legal custody may exist a first stride toward adoption proceedings.
   • Stepparent adoption. Stepparent adoption is usually less complex than other forms of adoption. However, in nigh cases the other birth parent must still give consent to the adoption.^[35]
   • Incapacity or unfitness of the biological parents. In some cases, the court will laurels custody of a child to a person who is not the child'south biological parent if the kid'due south biological parents are incapacitated or unfit.
     • If the child'south biological parents are both incapacitated due to illegal activities or imprisonment, for example, the court may grant custody to some other person who will be a better custodian for the child.^[36]
   • Mutual agreement. In some cases, both biological parents may agree to waive their rights to custody. For instance, if both parents believe that another person raising their child will provide the best living situation for the child, they may voluntarily surrender their rights.^[37]

2. two

   Hire a family police force attorney. Gaining custody of a kid when you are not the child's biological parent is extremely complicated. It's best that you hire an experienced family law attorney. Employ the steps in Method i of this article to help you select an chaser.

3. 3

   Asking the biological parent(southward) give upward their parental rights. This request is common if the custodial parent has remarried and the new spouse wishes to adopt the child. Before a stepparent can adopt a kid, the non-custodial parent (the parent who does non have concrete custody of the child) must surrender his or her parental rights.^[38]

   • The strongest statement in this situation is the do good of the child. For case, if the kid is happy and stable living with the custodial parent and their new spouse, information technology may be easier to persuade the non-custodial parent to surrender his or her rights.^[39]
   • If the other nascence parent does not consent, you may be able to continue anyway if you can prove that the other parent has abandoned the kid. This is usually demonstrated by showing that the parent has not communicated with or supported the child.^[twoscore]

4. 4

   Prove that the biological parents are unfit. This is the strongest argument that can exist used in adoption cases when the biological parents desire to retain or reclaim custody. To analyze, this ways that a biological parent will non have to show that they are a fit parent. Instead, they must exist proven to be unfit. Here are a few additional points to keep in heed:^[41]

   • Different courts define "unfit" in different ways, so make sure you lot check in the state where you lot will file for custody. For instance, the Michigan Supreme Court found that "a parent is unfit when his or her conduct is inconsistent with the protected parental involvement or the parent has neglected or abandoned the kid." Neither the existing law nor the ruling provided specific guidelines to make up one's mind fitness. Individual judges in Michigan are still considered to have a high degree of latitude in their rulings.
   • In general, if the child has been abandoned, denied necessary intendance or has been abused, these can be considered as signs of parental unfitness.^[42]

5. 5

   Demonstrate that yous have a parent-like relationship with the kid. In many cases, people other than the parents of a biological child may perform parental-blazon duties. These include managing the child's pedagogy, providing most or all of the child's daily necessities (food, clothing, shelter, etc.), and managing the child'southward health care needs.^[43]

   • These facts on their own may not be enough to persuade a judge to grant you lot custody. However, if the biological parents are also not performing their parental duties, you may take a stronger case.

6. vi

   Seek a "consent guardianship." Considering it is then difficult to merits custody of a child against the consent of a biological parent, the better road may be to seek "consent guardianship." In this case, the parents consent to a tertiary party (usually a relative) having custody of the child. A consent guardianship means that the parents agree that it is in the kid'due south best interests to live with the third party.^[44]

   • However, even if a parent initially consents to a guardianship, the parent has the right to revoke that consent. If the parent revokes consent, the tertiary political party must use for custody based on the unfitness of the biological parent (every bit discussed above).
   • Additionally, if the child's parents passed away or indicated that they would similar to give up parental rights to the child, it is possible that the tertiary party can adopt the child.

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1. one

   Know how custody tin can be modified. At that place are two principal ways that custody orders can be modified: the court tin modify custody decisions at whatever fourth dimension; or the parents may jointly consent to modify custody decisions.^[45]

   • If both parents do not agree to alter the custody arrangement, the parent seeking the modification must file papers with the court to request the alter.^[46]
   • It is unlikely that y'all volition exist able to get a custody order changed within the first two years.^[47]

2. ii

   Be prepared to demonstrate a change in circumstances. If you are requesting a change in an existing custody agreement, you lot will need to demonstrate to the court that your circumstances are different than when the custody decision was made.^[48]

   • For example, if you were not awarded physical custody because yous did not have stable employment and that has since inverse, you may exist able to petition to alter the custody understanding.
   • Another case might be if ane parent is relocating to another state. If you have visitation rights but not custody, yous may be able to petition the court to change your custody arrangement to permit you to maintain a "meaningful relationship" with the kid.^[49]
   • The child's wishes may also get a factor to consider. For example, the original custody decision may take been fabricated when the child was very young. If the child is at present at an age where s/he has a preference for which parent s/he will alive with, the courts may consider modifying a custody decision.^[50]

3. 3

   Understand that you may need to go to mediation. Some courts require mediation earlier they volition change a custody or visitation arrangement. Y'all and the other parent may need to see with a mediator to discuss the reasons for the potential modification before a courtroom hearing is scheduled.^[51]

4. 4

   Fill out and submit the appropriate forms to the court. These forms volition vary by state. Your court or family police force attorney can tell you which forms yous will need to use.

   • If you cannot afford an attorney, many courts offering family law facilitators who can review your paperwork. Contact your court to see if this service is bachelor to yous.

5. 5

   Serve the other parent with papers. The other parent must be served with a copy of the papers you have filed with the court. You should non deliver these papers yourself.^[52]

   • If y'all are delivering the papers past mail, you will usually need to do this at least 2 weeks in accelerate of the court hearing. The requirements may vary depending on your jurisdiction.

6. 6

   Attend your mediation and courtroom hearing. If you have been required to attend mediation, you will do that before y'all nourish the court hearing. If you cannot come to an agreement in arbitration, you will need to plead your case in court.^[53]

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Warning

• The in a higher place consists of legal information, and should not be construed as legal advice.
• Seek the assistance of a family unit lawyer in contested custody disputes.

About This Article

Article Summary Ten

To get child custody, y'all'll need to demonstrate to a gauge that y'all can be a suitable parent to the kid. Keep in mind that judges volition wait at your employment history, your living state of affairs, your concrete and emotional health, and whatever history of abuse. They'll as well take into consideration the child'south age, health, and relationship with each parent. Before you attempt to get child custody, information technology'due south a adept idea to hire an experienced attorney to aid you with the process. For more than communication from our Legal co-author, like how to resolve a child custody boxing through mediation, keep reading.

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